Monday, September 7, 2009

MAKING UP STORIES ON THE SPOT REMINDS ME OF CAPSLOCK (THOUGH I'M NOT SURE WHY.... )

Alright, boys and girls. It's time for more exciting adventures of Captain Xerquee!

When we last left our hero, he was trapped in the dreaded clutches of the zipherious ZouZahr Gang. How will Xerquee get out of this one?

"Give up, Xerquee!" growled ZeeZahr, leader of the gang. "Try as you might, you don't have a chance of breaking out those energy shackles."

"I'll never give up." replied heroic Xerquee. "I'll never surrender."

"How noble," hissed ZahZahr, ZeeZahr's second in command. "But even if you could escape, you'd never reach the bomb in time to stop it from obliterating your home planet."

No, Xerquee thought. This can't be it. There has to be a way out.

Suddenly, there was a great crash. Someone, or something, had just broken through the ceiling.

"What's that?" cried ZeeZhar.

"It is I," the mysterious figure announced, "the narrator!"

"W-W-What?" sputtered ZeeZhar.

"You heard me," replied the narrator. "I'm NORM, the narrator."

"Narrator of what?" inquired ZahZahr.

"Of the story, silly" answered NORM. "Which means whatever I say goes. And I say, that you ZouZahr guys are pretty mean. So I'm turning you into bubblegum flavored toothpaste."

"Huh-wuh?" said ZeeZhar, exceptionally flabbergasted. "Why?"

"'Cause everybody loves bubble gum flavored toothpaste!"

"It's true," chimed in a still enchained Xerquee.

Suddenly, every member of the ZouZahr Gang transmuted into tubes of bubble gum flavored toothpaste. The bomb did, too. And the energy shackles.

"Huzzah!" cried Xerquee. "Once again, the day is saved, thanks to a highly improbable Deus Ex Machina!"

"Hey, that's my line!" NORM said.

Both of them laughed as the screen slowly faded to black.

2 comments:

  1. I hope everyone understood my implications that this is set in the future in a giant spike and laser turret covered space station filled with chocolate jello. And sharks. Robot sharks. That are on fire. While under water. Which also fills the space station. Also, Xerquee looks like a cross between Chuck Norris and Buzz Lightyear. I think the ZouZahrs are squid like in nature. ...I have no idea why that one part is white.

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